The Consciously Parenting Blog Archives - Page 6 of 17

Self-care and Community Care are Essential for Healing: Principle 8

Principle #8- No person is an island. We need to create communities of support for ourselves and our children. We need to take care of ourselves so that we can take care of our children and our families. When a relationship isn’t working well in your life, it’s essential to find ways to take good care of yourself and find

Healthy Relationships Need Boundaries: Principle 7

Principle #7- Boundaries are an important part of life and healthy relationships. We can set appropriate limits with others while still respecting their needs and feelings if we are aware of ourselves. This is true for every relationship we have. Boundaries are critical for healthy relationships. When something isn’t safe or doesn’t feel safe to us, we need a boundary. Just

Appropriate Expression of Feelings: Guiding Principle 6

We’re continuing our series of Rebecca’s revised 8 guiding principles from her new upcoming book, It’s Never Too Late to Heal, all about healing relationships in our families, couple relationships, extended family and friends, whether we have contact with them anymore or not. Today, we’re exploring Guiding Principle #6, all about the importance of space for feelings. I think this

The Stories We Tell Ourselves, Stories in Our Bodies- Principle #5

We’re exploring my revised principles for healthy relationships as explored in my new book, It’s Never Too Late to Heal, due out winter 2022. To really understand some else’s behavior, we need to understand that there are two primary experiences that help us to make sense of what we’re seeing. The first are the stories we tell ourselves about what’s

Responsiveness is the Key: Principle #4

We’re exploring my revised principles for healthy relationships as explored in my new book, It’s Never Too Late to Heal, due out winter 2022. Principle #4– Behaviors occur on a continuum. Behaviors in children and adults correlate to the parents’ own neurodevelopment and attachment status. Responsiveness is the key. On one end of the continuum, you’ve got people who are very

A Need When Met Will Go Away

Principle #3- Children unfold neurosequentially, and high-quality, connected relationships allow for the unfolding. A need met will go away; a need unmet is here to stay. The word neurosequential was coined in the 1990’s by Dr. Bruce Perry, a neuroscientist, brain researcher, and clinician. He explains that our brains develop from back to front (i.e., most primitive to most developed)

mother and daughter making food together

There’s nothing more important than the relationship!

Revised Principle #2- Nothing is more important than the relationship. The relationship we have with others is more important than anything else. We know from research that babies in orphanages who have their physical but not their emotional needs met fail to thrive and frequently die. In addition, the research of Dr. Bruce Perry, a psychiatrist and brain researcher out

All Behavior is a Communication, Principle 1 revised for It’s Never Too Late to Heal book

I’ve been hard at work on my 4th book, It’s Never Too Late to Heal and it’s coming in early 2022! This book is written for parents and also for anyone who was once a child or anyone who is in a relationship with someone else who wants the relationship to work and feel better. In my first book, Consciously

Making Space for the Little Things

My youngest, who is turning 18 on Friday, came to me last week to talk about something that happened with some of his friends. He was upset at how something had gone when they were playing a game together and he really wanted to talk about it. That conversation shifted into some deep sharing about the connections he was making