Boys. Whether you’re expecting a boy or already have one in your family, we want to do our best to raise them to be emotionally healthy members of our families and then their own families one day. But how do we do raise emotionally healthy boys?
Today I want to share a few recent stories from my home where I have been able to see the effects of many years of practicing Consciously Parenting. I have been doing this for 13 years. 13 years of investing in learning about how to parent differently, practicing the way I want to respond to Read More
I told her that if she was feeling sad and either she couldn’t find someone in that moment to give her a hug, *or* if she just didn’t want to have to do it right then, because she was out or having fun or something, then she could put her Sad in her pocket for later. I went on to say that she couldn’t put Sad in the trash can. There’s no getting rid of it and not taking care of it. But she could put it in her pocket and then later she could pull it out when it was a better time and get her hugs then.
Several years ago, I was struggling with my 11-year-old son’s transition to school in the morning. I just wanted him to get up and go to school! He loved his school and I really couldn’t understand what the problem was with getting there on time. He was so slow in the morning and it was Read More
Boundaries are a foundation of our homes, and many well-meaning parents believe (mistakenly) that parenting consciously means that we don’t have any boundaries or limits for our children. So today I wanted to take a few minutes and talk about boundaries and what that means here at Consciously Parenting.
I want to look back on these years – these 18 short years – and know that, while I may not have cherished every moment along the way, I really didn’t wish away the time or opt out of opportunities for connection. I want my son to know that even when I get frustrated, I still like him.
I date my kids. I date them because I want to know them more and on a deeper level. I date them so our friendship and trust grow. I date them because I love them and want them to know they are safe talking to me. I date them because it’s important to me to give them the time they deserve.
When your child is doing something that makes no sense to you, you make up a story to help make sense of it. Sometimes this story is helpful. Sometimes it’s not. We all do this. And it happened to us when we were growing up, too – our parent(s) made up stories about our behaviors. Read More
Has the course already started? How is this different from your other courses in the Learning Center? What is a Healing Story Circle? Are we actually learning to rewrite stories with our kids? Does this work for older kids or even adults? How much time will it take each week? Do I need to go somewhere for this course?
So many behaviors are a mystery, especially with our kids. It often seems like they were born a certain way with interesting idiosyncrasies. Most of the time their idiosyncrasies are cute and we don’t worry too much about them. Sometimes they’re annoying. And sometimes they’re worrisome and have an impact on our relationship.
My oldest used to have a difficult time around the holidays. It was all too much for her to take in, and she didn’t know how to tell me what it was that caused her to act so unlike herself. On day when she was four, I took her for a mommy-daughter date to do Read More
Q: There are times when I have to say no to something my child wants, but I’m not sure how to handle it when my child gets upset. Sometimes I just give in and let her have what she wants, but that doesn’t feel right and it makes it harder the next time I need Read More
I must confess that when I started September 2010 with a focus on taking good care of myself, I was secretly hoping that the month would good. Fun, even. Sure, I’d have days that were challenging for me, but going at a slower pace and nurturing myself would really help to off-set the yuck I’d encountered in past Septembers. I know that I’ve really needed to nurture myself and I was hoping that if I would just take the time to acknowledge what this month is really like for me, all would be swell.
My story is about the incredible power of Story Healing and how my family was able to get through a really tough time with the help of this knowledge. I am forever grateful that I was able to help my daughter (and all of us) to heal emotionally from her difficult experience specifically because of the support I received from Rebecca to do this work.
So when you or your child has fast-tracked to red, keep in mind that, deep down, there’s a feeling of not being safe. Does knowing this change how you feel about what’s happening? Instead of asking what you can do to make a behavior stop, ask, “What do you need to feel safe? What does my child need to feel safe?” And see what happens.