Thanks for starting this discussion.
I got both boys new cells phones. I was totally against it at first because of the challanges but the phone had chaperone on it. It could show me exactly where they were and how they got there if I were following them on mine. I thought it was a terriffic idea considering they like to wander from place to place but what I failed to take into consideration was the texting and what they would type if they did text. This incident just happened last week.
My 10 y/o was playing with 3 other children all around the same age and they were playing with nerf guns ( another thing I am very against) and spy equipment. Well the one 8 y/o was running and his shoe came off and he was trying to climb a fence and tore his sock and started crying and and blamed my youngest for hurting him. Thankful to God there was another adult there that witnessed the whole thing but here comes mine in the house screaming he hated him and was going to beat him up. I could tell he was really stressed and very regressed !!
Well the boys parents called and started blaming and blah blah blah, and they said they never wanted him at their home again. Well that was abandonment to mine and he was furious
because they would not let him say what happened. He and I went out of town the next several days and I figured as with most kids things would cool off and they would be best friends again but they didn't
While out of town, he kept thinking of the situation and I could tell it was really upsetting him and I did talk with him and tried to get him to express his feelings. He did so when he texted the kids mothers phone and threathened to hurt their son at school.....
They were already mad now they were vengeful.
They called the police and filed a complaint due to the threat made to kill their son. How many children say " I'm so mad I could kill you?" and then play the next moment. These two children have never fought in over a years time since having known each other.
My neighbor called me to tell me that a sheriff was at my home looking for my kid and all I could think of was for what? Because we were gone 3 days they went to the school and notified them of the threat against another student.
When we returned I went straight to the sheriffs office but could not get any info. The next day a detective assigned to the case visited us as the complaint was in the Attorney Generals Office
The detective was so very nice. He handled it really well and I told him of my childs past and his reactions to things and he gets really fustrated when he is not able to explain a situation. My little one told him that he would not hurt the kid because they were good friends but he wanted to say what really happened but they wouldn't let him and he got mad so he texted them 4 times.
The saddest part of this all is how the other childs parents were reacting to the situation. We will call the boys mom C and the visiting mom T. Well C apparently forgot that T was there when the incident happened and told the biggest story to T one afternoon of how my kid was on top of her child and was taking the nerf gun in his face and was on top of him beating him. "T" stopped her and refreshed her memory or so she thought and T's husband even went to talk with them to try and straighten it out and how unreasonable they were being and that children will be children. Well they did not like that advice because they had already told the story to the sheriff.
The dectective called T and talked with her and got the same story that I had told him so he had to do his paperwork and submit it to the State Attorneys Office. It wasn't over yet because the school could not allow him to stay in school due to the threat and I was ill in bed and had to go and get him. He is permanently suspended until they can resolve in their minds if he is a threat. I must say I kept really calm because the school psychologist came to do an assessment and just shook his head saying "this child is no threat" I also reminded him that my child had an IEP and is protected as far as his work under the IDEA. He said he spoke with the the Ass Principal and teachers and not one person could say a bad thing about him so monday I should hear from the school about him returning.
Has this child learned a lesson from texting ? Maybe. It was his way of expressing his feelings, right or wrong. I am not worried about it. It won't go any further than it has already. His texting may have been wrong but the parents lied about my child beathing up theirs which ruined their case as far as wanting to prosecute.
I will say I am worried about the other mother "C", this is not like her. She just lost a sister in Nov and her father is dying and I think she is headed for a breakdown. She has not allowed her child to go to school. She has always been the easiest person for the children to be around and never any problems so this action to prosecute shocks me coming from them. The dectective said they were really out to prosecute for the maximum which could be 5 yrs in juvy. Oh well another day and another lesson learned I hope.
Oh yes, his cell phone is in time out. When I got the phones I requested that there be no texting but I guess they would just leave a voice message if they were that angry wouldn't they ?
Before closing, I will say that my child has advanced so far with BC. If you could have seen how calm and cool this child was with the detective and psychologist, I must say I was really impressed. (that's why they did not see him as a threat. To bad he couldn't regulate himself before sending that text.
Its great to be back on line again with all our drama
Cell phones
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