Help for younger sibling

erikashannon · 05-23-2009, 12:19 PM

Dear Friends,

I would like to post a problem situation and see if any of you all have ideas on how to address the underlying problem?

We are friends with a family with two boys - ages 9 and 7. The younger boy has been having trouble in school and at home with aggression. His teacher at school has said that he, "Is playing too much with older boys at home and this is causing him to be too aggressive on the playground at school(fighting when "losing" the playground games). This younger sibling tends to follow along with his older brother's playdates and often feels "left out" because he is not included as one of the older boys. When he does have playdates after school with kids his own age he seems very disregulated and has trouble sharing with his same age playmates and trouble getting along with them. The school teacher and guidance counselor have both been involved. They have brought the "problem behaviors" to the parents' attention but I am wondering what ideas our forum could suggest for tackling the underlying needs for this younger sibling.

Thanks so much to all who respond.
Warmly,
Erika

jen0608 · 07-20-2009, 08:55 AM

That's an early sign of sibling rivalry or I may wrong.

Rebecca · 07-20-2009, 03:01 PM

Hi Erika,

I am not sure why I missed this post. Sorry about that! I'm wondering what has happened since you posted this and where things are now, so that I can say something potentially useful!

I'm wondering more about this child's history. What else has happened in his life? It sounds like he isn't feeling like he fits in anywhere. It sounds like there needs to be more adult involvement to help him learn to interact in appropriate ways and to draw him in when he gets dysregulated. There is such a big difference between 7 and 9 year olds!

Those are the thoughts off the top of my head. Let me know what is going on now and we'll see what else comes to mind.