School Refusal

[Annie]

My "school problem" at this point is a new one for me but becoming increasingly alarming.

We adopted a 12 year old boy from Russia in the fall. Unfortunately, he arrived just in time for the first week of school. I say "unfortunately" because my other adopted children have come home in the spring, and had a nice, relaxing summer to adapt to our family and to learn basic English. Well, because I work (at the church with which his school is associated, BTW), Ilya really had to go to school. We placed him in 4th grade for a couple of reasons - firstly, in terms of size and maturity, he seems to fit in well. Also, this particular group of children are very kind and understanding. Finally, the teachers are more experienced and have had ESL students previously. He went for the first few weeks, with no real problems, except that I felt it was fairly useless for him, as he could not participate in much. We tried giving him some other work to do on the computer, but all in all, I could tell he was getting little out of class and he began to get less and less happy about going. We tried a tutor for a few hours a day, but I don't think she was very adept and he refused to cooperate with her.

About this time his teachers and I decided that he might get more out of going to a Russian lady's home to study English with her 2 or 3 days of the week, and attending school the other days. However, Ilya began to refuse to go to school on the "school" days. He insisted on going to Natalya's instead. Now, Natalya feels that she would like him to go to school. Thinking in English and in Russian and keeping him occupied is too wearing for her. Also, this would have needed to come to an end, anyway, as I can no longer afford it. However, at this point Ilya physically refuses to go to school.

I have tried having the Asst. Principal come over to talk to him (kindly and encouragingly) and that helped for a day. But only a day. I honestly don't know what to do now. Ilya is so strong that I cannot physically make him go. I know that the school staff will not physically put him in class. Furthermore, I balk at this kind of physical confrontation. But, what to do! He can't spend the day with me in my office! He gets nothing out of being at home! I am at wits end! We live in a poor public school district, (far from my work) so it would be counterproductive to try public school. (As if I could get him to go there, either!) I am at a loss.

I see where school probably is magnificently boring for him, but he is allowed to draw, read Russian books, or work at the computer when the lessons are too boring for him. I know he'd learn English better in school. How can I get him there?

[Ryan]

I can only respond to what is required by law in a public school. The situation will be different in a private school, as many of the laws that govern schools do not apply. When your child is enrolled in a public school, he is entitled by law to a free and appropriate education (FAPE). If your child is bored, disengaged, or not being instructed in a manner that is appropriate and/or equivalent to English speaking students, the school may be out of compliance with the law. Under the letter and spirit of the law, the school must provide the same services to your child as they would another English language learner (EL). Reading books in Russian and working at a computer are not the only instructional strategies available to engage and educate your son. Aside from the relationship issues discussed in Rebecca’s post, it is important that the school provide your child with a FAPE. If that involves hiring a translator or providing tutoring for your child, it is the school’s responsibility. Your child is at an age where he understands if school is valuable to him. At present, it does not appear to me to be an effective educational setting for your child.

Regards,

Ryan