In my continued conversation with Tanya and her 16 year old son Gavin about their educational choices, you’ll hear a refreshing perspective on following your intuition and trusting yourself. Tanya calls on parents to turn trust we’ve traditionally given to societal systems back to ourselves and our children – whether kids are in schools or not.
Meet Tanya and her 16-year-old son, Gavin. They started their schooling journey with public school because “that’s what you’re supposed to do.” As a family with a value on schooling through travel and experiences, they realized public school wasn’t really a good fit for their family. After a short time of schooling at home, they discovered that unschooling was a good fit for their family. This is their story.
We all grew up in the Old Story of parenting where love, respect and boundaries all had different meanings than the ones we’re trying to create for our own families and our own children. As we work to do things differently, we often get caught up in the Old Story that we don’t even know we’re telling ourselves and are recreating in our families. It takes becoming more conscious of this old story so that you can release it and embrace the New Story you’re co-creating with your family.
What are the origins of your concepts of love and respect? Can you separate the way you desire to parent from unhelpful past models? Much of traditional parenting rests on a hierarchy of power and control. Love is a reward, based on meeting certain conditions. Respect is born of fear. If children fear their parents, they will respect them and obey them, hoping to earn their love by meeting their parent’s conditions.
How can you include individual perspectives, personalities, learning styles, preferences, and aptitudes in open and respectful family discussions about learning environments? Begin with trust – in yourself and your intuition, in your children and their uniqueness, in your relationship, and in the wide array of learning options you can uncover if you keep an open mind.
How do you know when it’s time to leap into the unknown and take a new educational path? Can happiness really be the touchstone we turn to when making family decisions?
Parents have a barrage of choices surrounding the educational environments their children are in. The constantly changing needs and wants of both parents and children must come together in a way that works best for everyone. It’s challenging! We’re in a time of expanding educational choices, and it’s important to openly consider all options.
What is a “normal parent”? Can conscious parents look to our current collective culture for attached parent models?
Studies are showing the number of children experiencing healthy emotional attachment are “abysmally low” for a modern and “advanced” society. Is parenting keeping pace with progress?
Parents today need courage to step away from the mainstream practices that are failing to foster healthy attachment.
Parents today are being given mixed messages about attachment parenting. With heavy workloads, lack of support, children with high needs, and conflicting parenting advice, many parents feel attachment parenting requires too much of them.
The truth is, responsiveness to stress and upset, and attunement to big emotions builds secure attachment – and this can be created consciously at any age or family stage.
The essence of attachment is beyond our physiological needs (food, water,
warmth) and is about thriving, not just surviving. Join Rebecca Thompson Hitt and Tracy Cassels as they begin this podcast series on Attachment and Healthy Development.
I knew that behavior changes due to punishment when I was growing came from a place of fear. If I changed my behavior, it was only in order to avoid more pain. I wanted my children to do the right thing because it was the right thing, not because they were afraid.
We’ve been talking about boundaries, finding them within ourselves and with others outside of our families. Many of the parents I talk to who have trouble with the metaphorical “Uncle Bob” also have a challenge setting boundaries with their own kids. Today’s episode, Christy Farr and Rebecca Thompson Hitt talk about what healthy, respectful and loving boundaries can look like with your kids.