We’re back again this week with Nathan McTague to continue our discussion on raising emotionally-healthy boys. In this episode, we talk about how to support our children when they are angry or upset.
How can we best support our boys when they are young and as they grow into men? There are many cultural messages for boys around feelings, so how do we navigate that territory? How do we stay respectful of our boys’ biology and neurobiology? We want to make sure we are creating the space for their emotions and really respecting that they’re different than we are as women and moms.
In this episode, Rebecca talks with Nathan McTague of The Center for Emotional Education. They discuss how emotion is actually processed in the brain, the real needs of children who are experiencing intense feelings, and how testosterone causes all kinds of “wonkiness” for teenage boys.
Boys. Whether you’re expecting a boy or already have one in your family, we want to do our best to raise them to be emotionally healthy members of our families and then their own families one day. But how do we do raise emotionally healthy boys?
I told her that if she was feeling sad and either she couldn’t find someone in that moment to give her a hug, *or* if she just didn’t want to have to do it right then, because she was out or having fun or something, then she could put her Sad in her pocket for later. I went on to say that she couldn’t put Sad in the trash can. There’s no getting rid of it and not taking care of it. But she could put it in her pocket and then later she could pull it out when it was a better time and get her hugs then.
Kids may or may not have words for what’s happening for them or what they’re worried about, but they will show you that something is bothering them through their behavior. They may be more aggressive than usual. They may seem sullen or quieter than normal. They may seem to have more energy. They may start to get sick more frequently or more severely. Our culture may label these things as misbehaviors or unrelated to things that have happened, but I’ve learned that most of the time they’re actually signs of stress, of a story that they can’t make sense of, or something that they need more support to handle.
Today we’re talking about how to support our kids and understand their experience of gun violence in our country.
Gun Violence, Safety, and Support for Families Finding your Mama Bear is about your perception of safety and doing something. It’s about the need to keep our children safe and how that impacts our nervous systems. Find ways to be proactive – whether that’s pulling your child out of school until the problems are properly Read More
The collective trauma that many Americans have experienced in bearing witness to such tragedies in schools and other public spaces, that either are part of their daily environment or resemble them closely, has caused many people to develop an ongoing defensive stance that can resemble the post-traumatic response of actual trauma survivors. Listen in to learn more about how our nervous systems are responding to this trauma.
We’re all scared right now and in that fear, no one is really listening to anyone else. How can we make it different? Why does it matter? We need to start with listening, and not just to the people who agree with us. But we need to find ways to make it safer to have the conversations we need to have and to listen to one another. In this series, we’re going to be looking at what it takes to really listen to understand and another way we can look at what’s happening with the boys and men in our culture that I haven’t seen anyone talking about. Let’s raise our consciousness and work together to help our kids!
Today we are back with Afsaneh Moradian to talk about when and how to let our kids work things out without jumping in to fix it or solve it. Much of parenting is about figuring out when to coach, when to intervene, when to be the mama bear and when to watch and have a conversation after. This is very much an art for any person spending time with these developing human beings.
This week we are beginning a new podcast series about the importance of unstructured playtime, with Afsaneh Moradian, author of the upcoming book Jamie is Jamie. Play means kids get to do whatever they want to do, inside or outside, using what is available to them. The main thing is that they are choosing what to do. It is not about an adult offering ideas and suggestions, but the child looks around to see what’s available and chooses what to do.
In this final discussion with Carrie Contey, we take the topic of triggers beyond the day-to-day experience of stress and struggle to the level of personal transcendence. It’s a delicious conversation that will refuel your parenting energy. Here, we’re offering a broader perspective of what it means to be triggered into a stressful reaction in your daily life with kids.
Transforming reactivity to a conscious response is a continuous practice. It’s done in millimeters, not quantum leaps. Little by little we change and grow, by acknowledging our stress triggers and how they feel in the body.
We’ve all had them. Some are small, others overwhelming. If you’re here, you’re a step ahead in that you’re aware that you have them. Parenting brings them on in full force. We’re talking about triggers with guest parenting expert Carrie Contey.
My story is about the incredible power of Story Healing and how my family was able to get through a really tough time with the help of this knowledge. I am forever grateful that I was able to help my daughter (and all of us) to heal emotionally from her difficult experience specifically because of the support I received from Rebecca to do this work.